01/03: Rach's Choice...
Choice. “Well, I had no choice” “They gave me no option” “He made me do it” The choices we make not only define who we are, but, where we are now is a direct result of all the choices we have previously made.
In my very first lesson Sensei spoke about drawing your sword. The minute you choose to call someone on their behaviour or even make the wrong sort of eye contact with some people you are drawing your sword. You made a choice. You probably didn’t realise you did, at least I didn’t. I had been doing it all my life, drawing my sword that is. It was a defining moment in my life and at that moment during my first class I realised Martial arts had a lot to offer me and even way back then I realised it was about self control and how you deal with situations. I remember thinking, oh, so this is what martial arts is and I thought it was all that Kiaiing and breaking boards and stuff. How wrong had I been all my life!
Understanding this and then actually putting it into practice in your life is the cutting edge.
Most of you will be unaware, but I started martial arts purely because of a road rage incident in which I was severely damaged. I lost my job as I couldn’t work for a while and the perpetraitor was sent to jail. I decided I never, ever wanted to be in that situation again.
So last Friday as the car beeped loudly at me and the enraged driver emerged striding towards me, quite clearly drawing their sword. I made a choice. It was a split second decision. In a nano second a barage of previous images flashed in front of my mind, all ugly. Then all those years of training kicked in and I was in my internal “ready stance”. I was completely present and aware of the breath and just incredibly switched on. This gave me a gap. It gave me space to choose. It’s profound. And its just ready stance!
My immediate choice was to not react to the anger in front of me. You see now, I have a very big sword to draw. So as the abuse continued, I obseved keenly the situation, her face contorted in rage, the sound of her voice, my own heart rate rising, my breathing getting faster, the sweat forming on my palms. I heard my voice placating in a calm low measured tone. The abuse continued, more intense, more cutting. My heart rate increased and I could really feel it banging in my chest. By now part of me, a big part truth be known wanted to just latch on in major way. I could take her out easily. But I stayed extremely calm and did not engage. The first decision was quite easy I have to say, (am I making progress? ) but I struggled tremendously as the tirade continued. But I was determined. Unless this person laid a finger on me I was not going to react. It was all over, they drove away. My refusal to react to the provocation saved the day (mine and theirs). This lady is blissfully unaware of just how lucky she is. Not that I was going to hurt her. No not me, not nowadays. This lady is lucky she picked on me. Lucky she didn’t meet the guy I met seven years ago…….
I heard a story about a man out fishing in his little boat. It was a beautiful day and he was enjoying peace and tranquility when another boat bumped into his causing him to capsize and fall in. Clambering back in he was enraged. How rude. How negligent. How stupid. How could someone be so idiotic and just do that to him like that. As he gathered himself to give a big tirade to the other boat captain, gee they were going to get a piece of his mind. He realised there was no-one in the boat. It was empty. It had merely drifted on the current and bumped into him. There was no one to abuse, no one to be angry with. No one to listen to his rage. Realising, peplexed for a moment, his anger disappated, he just laughed at himself and continued his day. So here’s a tip. Imagine every car that invades “your space” “your territory” “your parking spot” is empty. Please, please please, do this. Its not worth it. Unless your life or your loved ones are in danger, imagine everyone bumping into you is and empty boat. I don’t want any of you to bump into my friend from all those years ago. He doesn’t realise it but he did me a big favour that day. I wouldn’t ever be doing this if we hadn’t of met…
I go to Japan Thursday so you won’t see me for a couple of weeks. Keep up your training. (And not just in the dojo eh….) I want to see you all being the best you can be for grading day on the 29th March.
Have a great week.
Rach
In my very first lesson Sensei spoke about drawing your sword. The minute you choose to call someone on their behaviour or even make the wrong sort of eye contact with some people you are drawing your sword. You made a choice. You probably didn’t realise you did, at least I didn’t. I had been doing it all my life, drawing my sword that is. It was a defining moment in my life and at that moment during my first class I realised Martial arts had a lot to offer me and even way back then I realised it was about self control and how you deal with situations. I remember thinking, oh, so this is what martial arts is and I thought it was all that Kiaiing and breaking boards and stuff. How wrong had I been all my life!
Understanding this and then actually putting it into practice in your life is the cutting edge.
Most of you will be unaware, but I started martial arts purely because of a road rage incident in which I was severely damaged. I lost my job as I couldn’t work for a while and the perpetraitor was sent to jail. I decided I never, ever wanted to be in that situation again.
So last Friday as the car beeped loudly at me and the enraged driver emerged striding towards me, quite clearly drawing their sword. I made a choice. It was a split second decision. In a nano second a barage of previous images flashed in front of my mind, all ugly. Then all those years of training kicked in and I was in my internal “ready stance”. I was completely present and aware of the breath and just incredibly switched on. This gave me a gap. It gave me space to choose. It’s profound. And its just ready stance!
My immediate choice was to not react to the anger in front of me. You see now, I have a very big sword to draw. So as the abuse continued, I obseved keenly the situation, her face contorted in rage, the sound of her voice, my own heart rate rising, my breathing getting faster, the sweat forming on my palms. I heard my voice placating in a calm low measured tone. The abuse continued, more intense, more cutting. My heart rate increased and I could really feel it banging in my chest. By now part of me, a big part truth be known wanted to just latch on in major way. I could take her out easily. But I stayed extremely calm and did not engage. The first decision was quite easy I have to say, (am I making progress? ) but I struggled tremendously as the tirade continued. But I was determined. Unless this person laid a finger on me I was not going to react. It was all over, they drove away. My refusal to react to the provocation saved the day (mine and theirs). This lady is blissfully unaware of just how lucky she is. Not that I was going to hurt her. No not me, not nowadays. This lady is lucky she picked on me. Lucky she didn’t meet the guy I met seven years ago…….
I heard a story about a man out fishing in his little boat. It was a beautiful day and he was enjoying peace and tranquility when another boat bumped into his causing him to capsize and fall in. Clambering back in he was enraged. How rude. How negligent. How stupid. How could someone be so idiotic and just do that to him like that. As he gathered himself to give a big tirade to the other boat captain, gee they were going to get a piece of his mind. He realised there was no-one in the boat. It was empty. It had merely drifted on the current and bumped into him. There was no one to abuse, no one to be angry with. No one to listen to his rage. Realising, peplexed for a moment, his anger disappated, he just laughed at himself and continued his day. So here’s a tip. Imagine every car that invades “your space” “your territory” “your parking spot” is empty. Please, please please, do this. Its not worth it. Unless your life or your loved ones are in danger, imagine everyone bumping into you is and empty boat. I don’t want any of you to bump into my friend from all those years ago. He doesn’t realise it but he did me a big favour that day. I wouldn’t ever be doing this if we hadn’t of met…
I go to Japan Thursday so you won’t see me for a couple of weeks. Keep up your training. (And not just in the dojo eh….) I want to see you all being the best you can be for grading day on the 29th March.
Have a great week.
Rach
